Anil Kumar's Sunday Satsang at
July 4, 1999
This is the Sunday Satsang held on the first floor of the North
Indian Canteen on 04-07-99, given by Anil Kumar.
Topics: Laziness, Ego, Yagnas, Suffering, Science and
Spirituality, Personal family stories.
Last week we started sharing certain descriptions of Bhagavan’s
trip to Kodaikanal, including certain questions put to Him and the
answers Bhagavan gave. I also gave some description of the
materialisations. With the passage of time, I shall also mention
these once again.
One question put to Swami was this: Why is it that some are lazy
in the name of spirituality? We find some people who are not
prepared to take employment, though they are quite physically fit.
Though they are quite eligible for a job and physically fit, they
think it is spiritual to idle their time. This is laziness,
laziness. Why, they even put on a long face, thinking that this is
spirituality. It was Vivekananda who said, "Long, serious faces
deserve a place in the hospital, not in the field of spirituality."
(Vivekananda said this. So please do not blame me, if anyone is
affected!) So, laziness is not a sign of spirituality. Certainly
not! But unfortunately, some are like that. They do not take any
job. They do not do any work and they have a complacent nature.
Swami, what are Your views about it? What are Your views?
The first point He said is this: "Laziness is rust and dust.
Realisation is rest and best." Realisation is a rest and best.
Laziness is rust and dust. No one should be lazy. Swami wants
everyone to do some work or other, to associate with one
assignment or another. Here Bhagavan said, "Do not expect God to
help you, unless you do your job." Unless you participate, unless
you associate yourself, unless you make use of your brain that you
are gifted with, unless you exercise the sense of discrimination
with the intellect that we are blessed with, God is not going to
help us. God helps those who help themselves.
He gave a few examples in this direction. What did He say? Here is
a match box. Here is a matchstick. Matchstick. If you want to
light it, what should you do? Take the matchstick and strike it
against the matchbox to light it. Am I not right? Similarly,
though both these flints are there, one must strike the matchstick
against the matchbox to get the flame. Likewise, you must make
your own effort to get the light. You must make your own effort,
do your own job, for this ‘light’ of realisation. In Telugu
Bhagavan always says, "Krushi vunte krupa vuntundi." Krushi means
human effort. Krupa is divine grace. You will have krupa, divine
grace, if you do that exercise which is called your own effort or
krushi. Krushi is human effort. Krupa is divine grace .This is
what Bhagavan says regarding those people who are lazy in the name
Then He gave another example. A devotee of Rama was going in a
cart. On the way he fell down. The whole cart in which he was
travelling turned upside down! It was reversed. This fellow who
fell into a convenient spot, started crying, "Oh, Ramachandra, I
am Your devotee. Is this the way that You are blessing me? The
whole cart just reversed now. I am suddenly on the ground! I am
helpless! Oh God, is this the gift of love?" He went on crying.
Then God appeared in his dream and told him, "Why, useless fellow,
I gave you muscles. I gave you hands. I gave you skills. I gave
you brains. Why don't you get up? Come on, get up! Try to place
the cart in its original position. It is reversed. It has turned
upside down. So come on, get up. Try to put it in the normal way.
I will assist you." So, as this man got up and tried to lift the
wheel, he found Hanuman on the other side, trying to put the other
wheel into its original place! This is the example given by
Bhagavan to impress on everybody that God is there to help us
anytime if only we put in our effort. It is a conditional clause.
With man’s effort, God’s grace comes. These are the views of Swami
What does He say about the ego? Any amount of things can be said
about the ego because there is no one without ego. There is only a
difference in proportion. One person may be the very
personification of ego, the very embodiment of ego. Another may
have 50% ego or 40% ego, but there is no one without ego. Bhagavan
said that we should all tell our ego, "Oh ego, you go! Oh ego, you
go because you are putting me to all types of problems, and all my
headache is because of you! Oh ego, you go!" Swami has also said,
"We can be free from ego, ego will certainly go, if only we
analyse what we are in this world." In this world, there are many,
many people. In the past, there were very noble people, sages and
saints. And now there are many Avatars and Incarnations, many
scientists and great people. The world is not short of rich people
or intelligent people. After all that, who am I? Compared to
everybody, what am I? God existed even before me. God exists even
now. God continues to exist even after I leave this world. God is
infinite. What am I? There are so many great people. Where am I?
So this sort of analysis, that is, trying to know where exactly we
stand in the company of the noble people, in the company of the
sages and saints, in the company of the devotees, helps us to
understand that we are nothing. That would be the best way of
driving out our ego. Rather, unnecessarily bloating up or puffing
or stuffing the entire ego, results in our head being full of ego,
which is a red signal for our fall in the near future. Ego grows
fast before a man totally falls. So the ego is most dangerous on
the spiritual path. Particularly Bhagavan does not even tolerate
an iota of ego. If He suspects that there is the least of ego in
any one of us, well, that is a matter for three months' treatment
– His very Himalayan silence!
Only recently I spoke to our former students, old students of our
Institute. They asked me to share a few thoughts from my mind with
them. I just now went and spoke to them. I am just coming from
there. I told them, "Hey boy, you may feel that Swami is not
looking at you. You say, 'Swami is not looking at me. He is not
smiling. In those days, I had a number of padnamaskars and a whole
number of interviews. Why not now? What happened to me now? Am I a
stranger? Am I a nobody? But in those days, when I was in full
form, He gave me the opinion that I was very important for this
Incarnation, that I was the only powerful devotee! Now what has
happened? Why is He avoiding me?"
And here is what I told my boys, just now. I told them, "Boys,
understand: He is avoiding you because He sees you first. If He
wants to avoid anybody, He cannot avoid them without seeing them.
So, when He is avoiding all of us, it means He is seeing us first,
in order of priority. Then if He wants to talk to you, He will
look at you next. So do not think that Swami is not looking at you
because He is positively, necessarily avoiding all of us. So, He
is certainly looking at us! Otherwise, how can He turn His back on
us like that? He saw us first! Therefore, He is looking away.
Hence, He turned His back! It is like a registered post. If you
send something by registered post, you will get an acknowledgement
receipt back. So, when He turns His back, that is our
acknowledgement receipt. Don't worry." That is what I was telling
them. Why all this?
When we ask, "Swami, how is it that You do not look at us? Why?"
He said, "I always look at you. I am here for you. But you did not
clean yourself. There are certain impurities. There are certain
obstacles between you and Me. Ego is an iron curtain between us.
It should be made thinner and thinner and thinner. It should get
lost once and for all so that I can look at you." The thicker the
ego, the farther and farther He is away from us. So, ego is a
thick curtain, rather an iron curtain, between a devotee and God.
Swami is really dedicated to such a thing. No one should have any
kind of claim of doership like, "I have done. I have done." If I
tell Him, "Swami, I arranged this all very nicely," He will say, "You
have not built it. You have not built it." And so saying, He will
see some dust in some corner. "Ah! This is how you have done!" On
the other hand, if I say, "Swami, excuse me. I wanted to do it. I
could not do anything. I am a useless fellow. It is a pity that I
could not come up to your expectations, Swami. Please pardon me."
Then His response will be, "No, no. You have done a lot!" (Anil:)
Why do you say like that?" (Swami:) "No, no, no. You have arranged
the hall and you have laid the carpets and the mike and everything.
Appa! You have done so nicely!" Why He speaks like this now?
Because I have not taken on the role of doership. I have not taken
on that role, or rather made a claim that "I" have done it. This
"I," the ego, is ruining everyone of us. It is only a difference
of proportion, that's all! When we just accept that we are
helpless, that we are not able to do anything, then comes His
blessing: "No, no. You have done enough. I am pleased." Because
God is pleased not with the quantum of work, nor with the
intensity of work, nor with talk about our work, but with the
feeling, the idea, with which we do it. The feeling with which we
do is more important than what we do. It is the ego that comes in
between. That is what Bhagavan has said.
Further, Bhagavan is a Poet of poets. He said, "You know, there
are many good things in this world. And there are bad things also.
Good things and bad things. But we miss good things and take bad
things, miss good, take bad. That is the miss-take in everyone."
So, the mistake with most of us happens to be: to miss good things
and to take bad things. Miss + take = mistake. That is the tragedy
of life. So these are the mistakes that we do because of the ego.
That is what Bhagavan has said.
In the same context, He narrated a story from our epics. I do not
want to go into the details but, in short, the story is this: One
demon prayed to God, "Oh God, let me be powerful. So powerful that,
on whomsoever I lay my hand on his head, he should be burned to
ashes!" Appa! Lovely desire this is! "So, if I keep my hand on
anybody, that fellow most be reduced to ashes!" That was his
desire, a rather demonic desire. "OK, God?" God responds, "Yes,
boy, carry on." So this fellow started running hither and thither,
putting his hand on everybody and people got burned. Finished.
Brought down to ashes.
Ultimately, this fellow wanted to test God. "If I keep my hand on
God’s head, what will happen?" So he went to Kailas straight away.
"Oh Shiva, You granted me this boon. Let me test it on You now!'
And God acted frightened. He started running. This fellow started
chasing Him. So God and this fellow started running and running
and running. In the meantime, the whole thing was noticed by
Laksmi. Vishnu is the Sustainer. Brahma is the Creator. Vishnu is
the Sustainer. Shiva is the Annihilator. So this is the desire or
boon granted by Shiva. Then Laksmi, the consort of Vishnu, noticed
what was happening. She thought, "This fellow will keep his hand
on Shiva. Next it will be my husband's turn! He, too, may be
burned like that!" Therefore, she wanted to take enough
precautions. Immediately she called her husband: "Look here,
Vishnu, that fellow is coming now. Be ready! Shiva will be
finished very soon and then he will come to you. Be careful!"
Then Vishnu thought over the whole thing and understood what he
had to do. He has taken on the role of a beautiful dancer, Mohini.
This devil's name was Bhasmasura. Bhasmasura started dancing and
Mohini started dancing. Bhasmasura was very much pleased with the
dancing of Mohini, the most beautiful star, and he started to
imitate her, with all the movements of his hands, gestures and
postures, so that he would equal her in performance. But then
Mohini, while dancing with all the postures and movements, kept
her hand on her own head. She kept her hand on her own head! This
Bhasmasura noticed it. "Oh," he said, "what a beautiful posture!"
And he kept his hand on his own head. (Anil claps his hands!)
Burnt to ashes!
This story Swami narrated and explained, "Look! Look here! God
created man. God created man. Man is so egoistical today that he
thinks that he is final. He thinks that he is the controller of
the entire creation, when in fact he has been exploiting the
entire nature. He is highly egoistical. He is so proud of himself
that he now starts denying the Creator!" Now he is questioning God!
Now he is denying God! Man, a mere creature created by God, starts
questioning the Creator Himself, like Bhasmasura, who wanted to
attack God, the Creator, the One who had granted him the boon in
the first place! What happened to the demon finally? He kept his
hand on his own head! Finished! So the present man is ruining
himself. No man is a cause nor is anyone responsible for our fall.
No. We ourselves are responsible for our own fall due to our own
ego. This you should understand. That is what Bhagavan has said.
And then Swami also referred to modern people. This was the
question put to Swami: Bhagavan, how is it that we have certain
rituals which appear to be outdated, old-fashioned. These rituals,
they are not ultra-modern. We are aware that we belong to the
computer age. We are highly conscious that we belong to Internet
and the space age. Why are these yagnas and yagas there at Dasara
time? During Dasara, we have yagnas and yagas, the fire and the
smoke. Our eyes start burning. Why do all these rituals which are
all outdated. Why don't You have some yagna at the Internet level?
Something like a package deal! Why not? Why not! Because these
yagnas and yagas are dreadfully ridiculous and outdated. When
everything is "the latest," well then, why not the rituals also?!?
These rituals appear to be quite funny. A few priests sit there in
front of the sacrificial fire, and tins and tins of ghee are
poured into the fire. Some smoke comes out of it, and we experts
are at a loss watching all of this! Ah! It is meaningless. Why?
This is the question. Some dare to ask, some may not, but this has
been the feeling of many of this present generation.
Swami gave a simple example: The rituals like yagnas and yagas,
the spiritual rituals, the Vedic rituals, are not useless. They
are not ridiculous. They are never outdated. They are very
important. And then He gave an example: One highly educated man
with his PhD in computer science, went to some village. It is his
first visit to a village. He never saw a village before because he
belongs to a metropolitan city of air pollution. So he went there
into the village. There he saw a farmer, an agriculturist. The
farmer was holding paddy grains and then he started throwing all
the paddy grains everywhere all over the field. This educated
fellow saw this and thought, "This fellow seems to be a madcap!
How is it that he is simply throwing paddy grains like that? That
is why India is poor! That is why there is no food here in this
country! People don't know how to make use of the paddy grains.
They simply throw it there!" He went to the farmer and said, "Hari
Ramu, you are a fool! Why do you throw them like that?! That is
food, don’t you know that?" The farmer said, "Sir, I am not simply
throwing it like that. One bag of paddy grain today will yield
fifty bags tomorrow. You do not know. You think I am simply
throwing like that. But they are being first sown in this way.
Then the field is watered and, in course of time, the seeds sprout
and we have the harvest of the crop. Fifty bags will come from one
bag of paddy. We will have fifty bags of paddy tomorrow." Then
this educated, latest man, with his PhD in computer science, could
understand that he has a PhD in foolishness also. Not only in his
field of specialisation, but also in foolishness!
Like that Bhagavan said that in yagna, near the sacrificial fire,
very valuable items are kept there, including tins and tins of
ghee. It is not a waste of money because out of this yagna and
yaga, smoke comes. It gets mixed with the atmosphere and air
pollution is gone. Air pollution is reduced. So the only solution
to air pollution is yagna and yaga. Most people today suffer from
lung problems and heart problems. Why? Environmental pollution.
So, as yagnas and yagas, as these spiritual rites are undertaken,
as spiritual rituals are performed from time to time, the air
pollution could be brought under check or control. That is what
Bhagavan has said. So, in the name of modernity, let us not call
these things nonsensical, ridiculous or meaningless.
Then another question is put to Swami: Bhagavan, I think I am
sufficiently spiritual in my calculation (because the other follow
refuses to calculate and estimate, so let me estimate myself in a
modest way). Well, I think that I am spiritual, but why is it that
I still suffer? Why? Though many people are spiritual, though many
people meditate, though many people attend nagarsankirtan, read
holy books, and fast every day if possible, though they do all the
spiritual practices and follow all the spiritual disciplines, but
yet they are unhappy. Why? A very good question. Why are we
unhappy, though we are spiritual? Why? Why do we have problems?
Why do we face problems, family problems, social problems? Why all
this? We are spiritual!
This is the answer that Bhagavan has given. I think you will be
very much interested to know it. Let us be clear about what is
happening in our spiritual life. Let us be very clear. What we
want and what we aspire for are two different things. We aspire
for two things. What are they? One is peace. Another is bliss.
Everybody wants peace. Everybody wants bliss. Peace and bliss are
two things which are very much sought after. People want them. But
when we start praying, "Oh God, please give me some lakhs of
rupees. Peace and bliss, they will follow the money. They will
naturally follow. So first grant me money. The rest of the things
will follow." The person in fact wanted peace and bliss to begin
with. He aspires for those things, peace and bliss, to start with.
But when he comes to prayer, he asks for worldly possessions,
worldly name and fame, worldly money. Therefore, here Swami says
there is a dichotomy. There is a dichotomy: We aspire for one
thing, but we pray for another thing. Something like, I want to go
to Madras, but I get into a Bombay train! So where do I go? The
ticket collector will come in between the two destinations and ask
me to get down somewhere else. That is a tragedy. So, we should
pray for that which we aspire for. What all we aspire for, what
all we dream, what all we really want, we should pray for that.
Because worldly desires, worldly positions, and worldly
possessions will never give us peace and bliss. We know that. And
we want peace and bliss. Yet we want these other things. That is
the reason why, though many are spiritual, they are still not
happy. They still may feel sad for this reason.
Secondly, Bhagavan said that we do not have proper priorities in
life. No proper priorities in life. What do you want? If you ask
any man, what do you want, if you ask a post-graduate student,
what do you want, "I want at least a green card to go to the
United States." Oh, very good. Or, one may want a Contessa car.
Good. What do you want? A four-figured salary? Impossible? A
five-figured salary? Oh. I see. So, these are the things that we
want. Not that it is wrong to ask for these things. No. In
priorities, where do you keep these things? What place you give
Bhagavan gives two examples: We have the Pandavas on the one side,
and then the Kauravas on the other side in The Mahabharata, the
sacred epic of this land. The wicked fellows are the Kauravas. The
noble, pious, and virtuous people are the Pandavas. Virtuous,
noble people give first place to God. First priority goes to God.
Next, to everybody else. They keep themselves in the last. God
first, others next, and "I", the last. That is the priority which
noble people, pious people, seekers and aspirants will have. On
the other hand, the wicked fellow will keep "I" first, others next,
and God in the last. A wicked fellow, in the order of priority,
keeps God in the last place. Here Swami says that if you keep God
in the last, you are lost, l-o-s-t. You are lost (1-o-s-t), you
are gone because, in order of priority, you have given the last
place to God, l-a-s-t. So happiness depends upon the priorities in
life. We are sad because of wrong priorities. That is what
Bhagavan has said.
So Swami, what shall I do now? All right, I have wrong priorities
now. OK, I understand I am wrong in giving top priority to myself.
I am sorry. So what shall I do now? Bhagavan gave a simple example,
saying, "You don't have to do anything else. Only understand
yourself." Swami, what is it? "Here is a glass of water. At the
bottom is sugar." A glass of water, at the bottom of which there
is sugar. All right. "Now taste the water at the top. Tasteless.
Taste the water in the middle. Tasteless." Oh, I see. "Where is
sugar?" It is at the bottom. "So what should you do now? Take a
spoon. Keep it there. Stir it up. Mix the sugar completely, so
that it gets dissolved totally. Now you taste the water on the
top. Is it sweet enough? You taste the water in the middle. Is it
sweet enough? You taste the water at the bottom. Very sweet, yes?
Why? Because sugar got mixed into it and dissolved totally. So,
body is the glass. Water is the life. Sugar is the divinity. Spoon
is the intellect. Body is the cup. Water is life. Sugar is
divinity. What you have to do is, with the spoon of the intellect,
stir it well, mix it well. That is sadhana. This process of
stirring up, this process of mixing is called sadhana or spiritual
practice." It only means the whole water is sweet now. Earlier it
was tasteless. Then and now, there will be sugar. Earlier, sugar
was there at the bottom. When once I mixed the sugar with the
spoon, the sugar got dissolved all over. Sugar is there from the
beginning. The sugar is divinity. So, sugar of life is divinity.
When once, with the intellect, we mix the sugar all over in the
water-of-life present within the cup-of-the-body, the whole life
is bound to be sweet. Life will be sweet. Life is worth living.
Life is meaningful. Life is purposeful. Life is enjoyable. Life is
fruitful. If at all we mix this divinity such that it gets
dissolved in the whole of our life structure, in the whole of our
lifestyle, in the whole of our life pattern, then that is how we
can make our life quite sweet and nectarine.
So my friends, we are unhappy now and then. We are very sad now
and then. We get carried away by certain incidents in our life. In
our individual life, we have a problem. In our official life, we
have a problem. I have a problem. Any problem is enough for me to
feel sad. Any problem is enough. Now, when once I mix the sugar of
divinity all over, then I pray, "Oh God, let me forbear it. Oh God,
give me strength to bear this problem. Oh God, give me the
strength to come successfully out of this problem. Oh God, give me
the solution to this problem, so that I don't have to feel sad at
That is the reason why Bhagavan says, "Why fear when I am here."
We sing that song very well. We quote it repeatedly. But yet we
fear because we do not know He is here. We fear because we do not
know that He is here! We are not aware that He is here. We are not
sure that He is here. Therefore we fear. But we sing, "Why Fear
When I Am Here." Fine. It is fine to sing, but we are not
convinced! If you are really convinced of that, when you have the
firm conviction that God is here, then there is no need to fear.
Only then we will really enjoy life. Life will be full of smiles.
So this is one solution that Bhagavan gave for all those who feel
sad in spite of being spiritual.
Then Swami made two points again here. After all, this greediness,
this greed makes everyone want more and more, over and over, too
many desires. And in order to fulfil those desires, we undertake
many, many responsibilities. Our thinking goes like this: With a
lot, I have. With money, I have. I am not satisfied. I want much
more. Therefore, I will have many more responsibilities. So, "Less
luggage, more comfort. Make travel a pleasure," goes the right-way
slogan. If you have less luggage, your travel is quite comfortable.
Your travel is quite happy. When we have more desires, the whole
life is full of burden a heavy luggage of desires. Therefore, we
are very uncomfortable. We feel very insecure and happiness is
totally robbed from us. So, Bhagavan says that in order to be
happy, one should cut down on their desires. Have a ceiling on
desires, a control on desires. It is most important so as to be
happy, according to Bhagavan.
And second thing that Swami said was that all this is our own
making. All this unhappiness is of our own making. He was talking
to the boys. One day here He said, "Hey Mister, get up!" There in
Kodaikanal He said, "Master, get up!" At that time, there were
about six professors there. I got up all of a sudden. He said, "Why
do you get up?" "I'm a master," I said. Swami said, "Are you a
master?" I answered, "Yes." Swami said, "No, no, no. You are not a
master." So I asked, "Then Swami, who am I?" Swami said, "The one
who has got control of the senses is a master. The one who has no
control of the senses is a mister. You are a mister, Anil Kumar,
but you are not Master Anil Kumar." So I said, "Oh, I see. So
shall I sit down or get up now?" Or run away from there? Then I
said, "Swami, in the way You meant, I am not a master. But by
profession, I am a master teaching boys." But God won't leave you
there! Then He said, "All right, if you are a teacher, if you are
a master by virtue of profession, there are six other professors.
They did not get up. Why did you alone get up?" He won't leave you!
Then I said apologetically, "I am senior-most, Swami. Therefore I
got up." Swami asked, "How?" I explained, "This is the
thirty-seventh year of my service. Therefore, I am quite eligible
to get up." Then He asked one of the professors, "What is your age?"
That man said, "I’ll be fifty-one." Without Him asking me I said,
"I'm fifty-seven. I’ll be retiring next year. Therefore I got up."
Then He said, " Appa! What a just indication, what a reply you
made! Now will you go!" He said.
So the point is, we feel like that in order to realise the desires
we have. All of this is of our own making after all. Our very own
making. He was talking to the boys, "Hey, boy. As a mister, you
are very comfortable. As a mister, you are a master of senses. Yes.
You are fine now. You are a master, and you are a mister. You are
just a bachelor. You are talking to boys. You are a bachelor. It
is quite nice. But you must be getting married very soon. You are
quite independent now, walking straight with two legs. When once
you get married, you will have four legs. You will have to walk
horizontally like an animal. With one child, you will have six
legs like a scorpion. With one more child, you will have eight
legs like a cockroach. As you have more and more legs, your
walking will slow down. Whose responsibility is that? Who is
responsible for all this bondage? Who has chosen for you this web
of bondage? Whom can you blame? It is all your own making." So,
for my misery, for my unhappiness, for my sadness, I am
responsible. No one else. So, all the desires, all the attachments
are of our own making. Let us understand. Let us not blame God for
Bhagavan further said that many of us feel sad, many of us, most
of us, beyond time and space. Most of us feel sad. Why? Bhagavan,
Psychologist of psychologists, said that there are two reasons:
We are sad because we always think of the past: Fifteen years ago,
I lost one lakh of rupees. So I cry now. Ten years ago, you did
not give me a good breakfast, so I complain to you now. Last year,
you did not answer my questions. So I do not want to look at your
face. Like this, most of the problems, most of the conflicts, most
of the in-fighting, most of the misunderstandings are because of
our brooding over the past. We go on thinking of the past. This
and that, that and this. The husband telling the wife, "Your
father has not given me the proper wedding suit." He already has
grandchildren now. Why is the husband grating the poor dead father
now, who must have already been finding a place on the other
planet! And then this wife goes on telling, "Your mother has not
treated me well when I first stepped into your house forty years
ago when we were married." The mother-in-law died fifteen years
ago. How can this poor fellow help the situation?!? So, we take to
this misunderstanding and fighting all because of the past. Please
forget the past. Past is past. Really speaking, if Swami considers
the past, I am sure, the whole of Prashanti Nilayam would be
vacant! But He gave us a blank check: All right, past is past. OK,
it does not matter. From now on, lead a good life. Every time He
gives us a blank check, but we continue to be what we are. At one
time when in a good mood I said, "Swami, if it is a matter of
competition between God and the devotee, between God and man, man
won over God. Why? God has taken ten births, ten Avatars, to
correct man. He failed utterly. We continue to be bad. We have
given You ten chances to reform us. You have failed! We have given
you ten chances to reform us as Avatar. You have miserably failed!"
So this is our life. Our life is not interesting for this reason:
We think of the past. What can we do? We are helpless. Past is
past. Further He said, you have walked all the way. You have
walked all through life. You do not need to look back because you
have passed that way. What is the need to look back? That time is
gone. Past is beyond recovery. You cannot get it back anyway. So
one reason for our sadness is thinking of the past.
The second reason for our misery is about the future: After fifty
years when I grow old and helpless, what will happen. Nothing will
happen. The world will not loose anything. It will celebrate if we
kick the bucket: Waste of food, that's all! So what will happen in
the world if I die? She will be more comfortable. Like this we
think of the future: What will happen to her when I die? She will
be more happy because this fellow who was a nuisance is gone. She
may not say it aloud now. Later, if this fellow has got a chance
to notice after leaving this plane, he will see how much happier
she is, how much happier without him.
So we value the future. We go on amassing money, money, and more
money, feeling that the money will save us from death. It was Osho
who said, "Love of money is fear of death." What a wonderful
statement it is! It appears to be rather funny. Love of money is
fear of death. Man thinks that he will keep himself from death by
having money. But the money is meant for those who are left
behind, not for the fellow who is leaving. So he will amass wealth
and he will depart one fine day. His children will enjoy it.
Therefore we think of the future and are very much worried. Hence
we do not enjoy the present.
So my friends, Bhagavan has said that much of the misery and much
of the anxiety and worry is because we think of the past and worry
about the future. Instead, let us live in the present. Bhagavan
said, "In the past it was a tree. In the future, it is going to be
a tree. In the present, it is a seed. The present seed is out of
the past tree. The present seed is a future tree. So the future
and the past, they are all trees. In the present, it is a seed. So
present is a result of the past. Present is the foundation for the
future. So it is not a simple present. It is omnipresent, as
Bhagavan explains repeatedly.
Last time there in Kodaikanal there was a discussion. During that
discussion, Swami made a mention of this story. The Raja of
Jamnagar, was an ardent devotee of Bhagavan. He came to see
Bhagavan and Bhagavan said, "All right, Raja. You go home. You go
to Jamnagar. I will see you there. I will see you there." This
Raja went. After few months, the Raja had a serious heart attack.
Being Raja, the king of that area, he was examined by thirteen
doctors. All this was told by Swami in Delhi. Swami Himself said
this: "Thirteen doctors examined him and declared him dead." But
suddenly the body got up and he started talking as if Swami were
seated there. "Oh, Bhagavan, have You come? You promised that You
would be here. I am so glad that You are here. You said, ‘You go
to Jamnagar. I will meet you there.’ You have fulfilled Your
promise." He started speaking like this. Because they had enough
courage, the other doctors did not run away from that place.
Normally, if any dead body gets up and talks, no, none of us will
remain there. Just imagine ourselves in that situation. Because a
big crowd was there, the doctors and everybody started wondering.
Suddenly the body fell down. At that moment, the Palace received a
telegram from Bhagavan, saying "Raja reached My Lotus Feet. Raja
merged in Me. Raja arrived here." That was the telegram sent by
Speaking this sincerely, Swami said, if you have got to laugh, if
you have got attachment, you need not freely leave this Divine
Body. The spirit will come to Me, will surround Me. Even now it
seems the mother of Bhagavan, Easwaramma, visits Prashanti Nilayam
still today. He was telling us what has happened sometimes, and
what she has said. One time, just in a happy mood, Swami said the
following. (Anil adds, "I don't know whether I am supposed to
share this with you or not, but I take the divine spiritual risk,
as I often do.") Well, what happened was this: It seems He was
feeling rather loose here in this part, where He wears His dhoti.
(Anil shows his waist.) And suddenly Swami said to the boys, "Boys,
I want a belt. Would you get me some belt?" (in order to make the
dhoti tighter). The boys took it quite literally. The next morning,
a few belts came: a belt from Singapore, a belt from Bombay, and a
belt from Delhi. That morning Swami exclaimed, "Chi, chi! Do you
think that I would have these belts?!? Chi! Take it away!"
That night Mother Easwaramma came to Prashanti Nilayam. She went
into His room directly. The boys who were sitting outside
Bhagavan's room could overhear the talk there. They slightly
opened the door to Swami's room. They saw Easwaramma and Swami
talking to each other. Mother Easwaramma told Swami, "Swami, You
gave me so many jewels in those days. I knew then that these
jewels should go back to You after my death. At that time my whole
body was burning with these jewels! I still have that chain, the
golden chain, Swami, which You gave me then. Why do you want those
other belts? Chi, chi! Take this chain and use it as a waistband.
It will be tight enough." And thus she gave her gold chain to
Bhagavan. It exactly fit Him. Then He gave that chain to one boy
there. And He told Easwaramma, "Why did you come like this? The
boys are afraid of you! You go now." And she left. Then Swami
asked, "Boy, bring that gold chain." That boy brought it and He
showed us that gold chain. From this incident Swami was explaining
that if you have intense love for people, even after you leave
this body, the spirit or the soul can still linger around, move
around those people whom you loved the most.
He also mentioned another incident connected with Easwaramma: One
day she came directly and the boys could hear the conversation.
They opened the door and listened to the conversation. What did
she say? "Swami, you have established a very big hospital. You
have lost weight. Why don't you have health check-up for Yourself?"
Health check-up, why not! So many thousands are waiting there. He
said, "Easwaramma, do not tell Me that. If you talk in this way, I
will not allow you to come back like this. Nothing will happen to
Me. Go." (Easwaramma)"I will not go, Swami, unless You promise
that you will go for a health check-up." Swami said, "All right.
What else to do? Those who serve us, their hand we should oblige."
All right! After some days, He sent word to the hospital doctors.
They brought some medical equipment, and checked Swami. To quote
Swami, "They all declared, Swami is the healthiest man! Healthiest:
BP normal, pulse rate normal, everything is paka (fine). The
doctors were very much surprised to see such fitness at the age of
seventy-five! What! So fit! That is the divine body. It is not a
human body. It is not a body like yours, not like your body or my
body. No, it is a divine body, so strong, so strong. This Swami
said, and He laughed and laughed.
It seems Easwaramma came once again on another occasion and she
said, "Swami, I have one request." "Hey! You go on coming here
with some request. Go and come." (Easwaramma)"Please, Swami!"
(Swami)"OK! Only this is the last request! What is your request?"
(Easwaramma)"You take a kerchief from everybody. Do not do that
hereafter because people of this century, people of these days,
are mischievous fellows, dangerous fellows. They may put some
chemical there on the kerchief that will poison You. Please do not
do that." And He said, "Amma, chi! No poison can do anything to
Me! Nothing! Nothing will happen to Me, I am telling you!" (Easwaramma)"No,
Swami, unless You promise that You will not take kerchiefs from
people, I will not leave from here." In order to drive her away
from that room, Swami said, "OK. I will not take from everybody. I
will take kerchiefs only from students hereafter."
There is another story Swami told about his physical father and
the request he made to Swami. He pleaded with Swami, "Soon after I
die, make some sweet preparation. I have also brought with me a
hundred rupees. When the time comes, get some small change for
this hundred rupees, and just distribute that change as the dead
body is taken in a procession. Why? Because I had a provision shop
here. When customers came here to buy some provisions, I might
have forgotten to give them some small change. I do not want to
leave this body in debts. No, let me clear up all these debts. I
should not be indebted to anybody. So, let coins be distributed to
everybody, Swami." That is what Swami’s father said. Baba told him,
"Don't worry. I will take care of it." He died on that same day,
and the coins were distributed to everybody as per his request.
And a sweet dish was prepared in the early morning. Then Swami
said that His father could have a premonition of his death because
he was the father of this divine physical body. Therefore, he
could know when his death was coming.
Bhagavan was also referring to His grandfather. Grandfather was at
that time, coming to Swami in the early morning around four o'clock.
He would come calmly and silently before the sun rose, around four
o’clock. Swami, the poor boy, the tiny tot with His blanket
covering Himself from the top of His head to the bottom of His
toes, would cover up more so on coming to know that Grandfather
was fast approaching! He covered so that Grandfather could not
notice His Feet. But Grandfather came slowly and despite Swami’s
effort to hide His Feet, he lifted the blanket and touched the
Lotus Feet. Like that, he would take padnamaskar and leave every
morning. That had been his practice.
Once Grandfather said, "Baba, my last prayer, I want You to answer
my last prayer." Baba said, "What do you want?" (Grandfather)"Swami,
I want You to be by my bedside when I breathe my last. When the
end comes, I want You to be there near me," Swami said, "OK." Then
suddenly one day Swami started moving to the Old Mandir. He kept
moving toward the village. Grandfather saw Swami coming there. He
immediately called the mother of Bhagavan, Easwaramma, the
daughter-in-law, and said, "Oh, Swami is coming. My end is nearly
approaching. I am going to die." And she said, "What, Grandfather!
You are 112 years. How is it you are going to die? No, no. You are
so strong!" (Grandfather)"No! Swami said that He would be here
when my end approaches. So I am going to die." (Easwaramma)"So
what shall I do?" (Grandfather)"Get some water and Tulsi leaf
ready." Then Swami came slowly and put His grandfather’s head on
His lap. Grandfather started looking at Swami. Swami made him sip
a few spoonfuls of water with Tulsi. Looking at Swami and praying
to Him, he breathed his last. Thus Bhagavan was describing the end
of His grandfather.
This story prompted other devotees, who wanted to know more about
the life-after- death, to ask some other questions to Swami.
"Swami, what will happen after death?" Another person started
asking, "Swami, what will happen to the spirit? How long will it
be there?" I was very much fed up to tell you honestly. These are
young boys. They have got a long life before them. For these young
boys, who have got such a long life ahead, such a topic they
should not relish. Immediately I said, "Swami, a humble prayer."
He said, "What is it?" (Anil)"Let us not ask questions on this
point. What have we learnt of death? We have nothing to say. If
the life after death is going to be interesting, well I cannot
help the situation here and now. I cannot be very happy now. Even
if I am going to be happy hereafter, my present debts and loans
are not cleared here. My present problem is not solved. And, on
the other hand, if I am going to be unhappy after death, should I
start caring from today? Why? Not necessary! Whether the
life-after-death may be happy or unhappy, why should I worry about
it now? On the other hand, we are extremely happy today watching
You. We are extremely happy today to talk to You. We are extremely
happy to be near You and to listen to Your message. It is time for
lunch. Let us go!" I said. He liked it immediately. "What he said
is true. Why do you want to know about the life-after-death,
losing the present good chance? The present chance is quite a
golden chance. To be in the company of God is most precious and
very much coveted. Why are you worried about the life-after-death?
Why all that? Now this is the golden opportunity."
So my friends, the sadness is there in us because we worry about
the future and also about the past. Then Bhagavan gave one simple
example: When you drop any heavy object, it will fall to the
ground. But if it is cotton, it will go up because of its light
weight. So too, as you become lighter and lighter, discharging
your duties as required from time to time, clearing all
responsibilities by the age of fifty, then you will enjoy life. If
a lady starts a fresh business at the age of sixty, or if a gent
wants to get married at the age of seventy, we cannot help the
situation. So, after fifty one should be free from all
responsibilities, as Bhagavan says. The whole life should be as
light as a piece of cotton so that it can fly high. It should not
be a dead weight so as to pull one down. So this is the secret to
being happy. That is what Bhagavan has said.
For this morning, I want to bring to your attention a beautiful
question put to Swami. I also notice youngsters are here. I think
they will be profited by hearing this. "Swami, many of the
scientists deny God. Many of the scientists are not for God or
religion or spirituality. They think that this life is the only
reality. Life is full of comforts, conveniences, extravaganza, the
full works, the music, the fun and frolic. That is their idea of
the reality of life. So they do not accept the very concept of God.
Now the question is: Are science and spirituality complimentary or
contradictory? Do they supplement each other, or do they negate or
oppose each other?" This is the question put to Him because there
were many students of science there.
Ah! What a beautiful answer He gave! "Remember, science speaks of
this. Spirituality speaks of that. Spirituality speaks of Tat,
That, whereas science speaks of this, Twam. Science speaks of
matter. Spirituality speaks of Atma, the spirit, the spirit behind
it, the principle behind it. Science speaks of matter. Science
refers to the physical body, the five elements and the world.
Spirituality speaks of something beyond, something transcendental.
Science is limited by the body and the mind. Spirituality
transcends the body, mind and intellect. Science is below the
senses. Spirituality is above the senses. Science is the split of
love. Spirituality is the spirit of love."
What a beautiful explanation! All these sentences are Bhagavan's.
None of them are mine. Please be convinced of it, believe me. "Science
is the split of love, while spirituality is the spirit of love.
Science refers to this world. Spirituality talks about the other
world. Science speaks of the five elements. Spirituality goes
beyond. Science has a beginning. But it does not know how to end."
A simple example: A scientist may invent an atom bomb. Once there
is an atom bomb blast, he cannot retrieve it. He cannot take it
back. So, science knows how to shoot. It does not know how to
withdraw. A scientist should be a "saintist," He said. A scientist
should be a saint, meaning: science is something like the letter
"C . It starts at one place and ends at another place. Whereas,
spirituality is like the letter "O". It starts at one place and
also ends there. It is holistic. It is total. It is complete,
whereas science is incomplete. "Science divides, whereas
spirituality unites. Science is diversity. Spirituality is unity."
In that way, Bhagavan explained the differences between science
Like this, there were several questions which Bhagavan answered.
Next week also, we will be dealing with these questions and
answers. Finally it will all be published in a book form quite
soon, but I want to serve things "hot-hot, fresh from the oven,"
as I often do. I thank you very much for listening to these things
in rapt attention.
(Anil Kumar closes this discourse by singing "Sai Narayana,
Narayana" along with the devotees gathered there, followed by
Asatoma… and Loka samastha…)
Thank you very much.
We meet next week, same day, same time.
© Anil Kumar Kamaraju 2004 - Here
reproduced for personal use of the devotees for the purpose of
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